I have been studying people for over 2 decades. I have been listening carefully to you, your neighbors, your children, your bosses and probably even your mailmen and manicurists. Let’s just simplify by saying that I have been listening to individuals from all walks of life for many years. And, these people have shared their secrets and their yearnings and have explained in great detail what helps them get through their days. I know what motivates people to get up in the morning and face yet another day. It is crystal clear to me at this point in my life and career what keeps us all moving forward even on the bleakest of days and in the dreariest of times. You will probably be very surprised by the answer. Let me make it clear that there are many aspects of life that keep us going to various degrees. Some of us are gratified by financial success. Others are gratified primarily by relationships. Many of us love nurturing our kids. Yet others take comfort in spirituality. The list is endless but let’s face it we don’t have all day, right?
Yes, the list of what motivates us is endless. Today, however, I am going to discuss the ingredient that is necessary for all of us no matter what else motivates you. We all need to feel NECESSARY in this life. In fact, if you don’t feel necessary then you are at risk to become unmotivated and sadly, depressed. We all need to feel relied upon and necessary for the smooth functioning of the day. Let me explain further. Take note of how many of the items on this list of 5 characterize your life.
1. We all need roles in life. Perhaps you have one role or maybe you have multiple roles. The key is that you are part of the machinery that operates a system and that can be a family, a team, a workplace, a volunteer group etc. The key is that you can define a role for yourself in your world.
2. We all need to feel relevant. We need to feel that our thoughts, opinions and other sorts of input are important to the dialogue at hand. We need to feel that we are still important. This is so true, yes?
3. We all need others to rely on us. Individuals rarely say this out loud because many of us are not aware of this need. Isn’t it gratifying, however, when a friend calls to ask your opinion? Or should I say texts you for your input?
4. We all need to feel like we are part of a team. This can range from being a member of a book club to being the chief executive officer of a large company. The common factor is that you are part of something larger than yourself and that requires your input.
5. We all need a sense of purpose. We need to know that the world will be just a bit brighter today because we got out of bed and showed up. Who doesn’t feel better knowing that they have somehow made a difference?
It is my hope that you feel needed. If not, perhaps you can reflect on how to change things up a bit in your life. Good luck.